“The need for closeness” by Thomas Schaller
We seek closeness, but do not want to be harassed. Need proximity but also freedom. It is best if we have a partner that matches our proximity distance model. If you are looking for a partner, you are looking for one that matches our proximity distance model (our notions of proximity and distance). “Why I cannot show my partner as much love as he does?” If you are looking for a partner, you are looking for one that suits our proximity distance model. Some have the idea of a partner who is always on their side, others have the idea that the partner must fight for her or others dream of a relationship in which you have enough freedom for hobbies, etc. When we are single and get to know someone, we often unconsciously pay attention to their proximity behavior, e.g. his body movements, posture. If his sewing pattern corresponds to…